im gonna take a long hot bath
February 26, 2006
after blogging, that is...
the past 2 days were for the most part happy and the other irritating, as most days are.
while people rally along EDSA, shouting and praying for our country's freedom, i lay in my bed, equally shouting(silently in my head) and praying that my dysmenorrhea would finally cease.
for the whole friday, i can only lay in bed and sleep off the pain. good thing we had no work.
the only bad thing about it is that the reason why we were asked not to work that day. i think our president is getting too paranoid. i woke up seeing 3 bold words flashing on the screen of our TV.
State Of Emergency.
i thought, was there another devastating landslide?
nope, there are just people gathering at EDSA to celebrate the 20th year of EDSA revolution, and yes, show that they have lost faith in the administration.
okay.
the phone
no this is not a horror flick. i just adore my phone, oz i get to take cool pictures with it. i mean sure, it only has 2mpixels, but for a phone, that's gold. (well for now)
and right now, this is my favorite.
ooohh isnt my nephew just soooo cute (and doesnt this look like i used an slr?how cool is that!)
& our love goes round and round;
2/26/2006 04:47:00 PM
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fallen
February 23, 2006
i watched the last part of 50 first dates, just a few days ago. right at the part when Lucy told henry, " So youre the guy who makes me fall in love with him everyday..." (or something like that)
grabe may ganun pa bang lalake????
ang sarap siguro nun no, when you find someone who loves you that much. haaaayyy..yes im in love with love, so what!
***
on crushing news
an old crush has once again resurfaced. its almost summer time, time to go back to my beach. i heard his voice just this morning, he said he's going back to bora soon. and i wanna come to. yuck! stalker!!!
well, its nothing serious naman eh, just a harmless crush. he.he.he. we're both attached so that makes everything clear.
im just...fond of him? i dont even know him besides what he does for a living, and that i know his gf, and he can maintain good conversation, if only i could stop getting all shy and freeze everytime he does try to start one with me hahahahahahahaha!
well, i still think its healthy to have crushes..basta you have to know your limits. a crush is a crush, nothing else...diba diba diba...
its fun and harmless and you feel elated every chance you get to see, hear, or for some wierdos, smell him/ her...
cute diba? hahahaha!
***
pero iba paren sya...
kasi sya lang namimiss ko ng ganto...
fuck*r
***
i have issues with body contact
napapansin nyo ba. when someone hugs me i freeze. minsan nakakailang...i have nothing against hugs, i actually like hugs, but i like to give hugs more than receiving them...at least those that i dont expect.
im not sure if he feels that, na pag bigla nya ko hinuhug para kong tood. hahahahaha! i have nothing against anyone naman eh, pag lang nainvade ang personal space ko tapos nabigla ako..i get this wierd feeling...but that's temporary lang naman...after a few seconds, pag naprocess na ng utak ko, i let my guards down na,,but anf freaky ko no?
and i think its genetic, coz my sister complains the same thing. hahahahahaha
& our love goes round and round;
2/23/2006 11:38:00 AM
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its lunch time
February 22, 2006
But i aint eating? why?
coz i have no more money, that's why..
count on me to lend almost all my money in my atm to a friend, thinking that ther'd be a miracle and 500 will last me till the end of the week. only it doesnt.
and of course, i forgot to borrow from my mom this morning (again)just enough to last me till next payday ( which i think is still on monday..its only wednesday)
yes im trying to kill myself..
well theres mangoes,,and popcorn,,and bottomless coffee and iced tea..i do have milk here...and what i think is canned sardines (if only i could find someone with a swissknife..before dinner)
but for now, id just have to reminice about the abundant week before...pictures will have to do...
haaaaayyyy...so preettteeee..
& our love goes round and round;
2/22/2006 12:28:00 PM
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di para sa mahina ang loob
February 14, 2006
minsan di ko maintindihan kung pano nagagawa ng ibang tao yung mga ginagawa nila...na para bang, wala lang! tapos pagnangyari na kala mo maamong tupa, nagpapaawa.
sya ba di naaawa dun sa naapektuhan dahil sa pagpapadalos dalos nya?
a week a go my friend died, because of people like this. and to think, pulis pa ang nakapatay sa kanya. bakit? all because di sila nagkabigayan ng daan..and just when you thought na napakababaw na nun, eto pa, yung friend ko naka bicycle, yung pulis naka scooter.
its stupid. he was so young, too young. and for such a stupid arguement, makatarungan ba yun?
my friend came from a basketball game, pauwi na sila nung iba naming friend when it happened. nagkasalubong sila tapos di magkabigayan. dun na nagsimula yun
apparently, bumaba sa motor yung guy (in civilian clothes) at sinabi na pulis nga sya. yung friend ko naman, siguro nga may kaangasan den kasi yun pero more of patawa na nangaasar lang naman yun normally, sinampal daw sa kanya yung patch nung lalake.
pero di pa dun nagtapos yun, bumunot ng baril etong pulis na to, pinaghahahampas nga daw yung friend ko kaya ren may tama sya sa may ear nya..nung time ata na yun na nakipagagawan yung friend ko sa baril, tapos pumutok. tinamaan sya sa daliri, by this time, he ran already. kahit ako man maputukan, tatakbo ren.
sa takot nung iba naming friend nung pumutok (they were trying to break the fight before pa maglabas ng baril si pulis, pero ayaw paawat) tumakbo na ren sila, nakatago yung isa, pero sya, nung malapit na kung san nakapasok yung isa kong friend, nadapa..
yun na..pinagmumumura na nung pulis habang nilapitan at chaka binaril, 3x. 2 on his back which got his lung and kidney, and the other, sa may batok na tumagos sa dila nya.
he fired a gun while my friend was down and has his back turned at him. wala syang laban..at 3 beses pa, lahat fatal.
pulis pa man din sya. that's what's really scaring me. he's a member of SOCO. baguhan lang, but still. he was given that gun, but that doesnt give him the lisence to just shoot it at anybody. galit man sya or not. and for such a petty reason.
pero shempre, what can we do but hope na maparusahan ang dapat parusahan. no special treatment.
sayang lang, he never got to see his daughter. naginvite sya dati na maginuman but i declined (eh anlayo kasi ng naman ng kanila) and from what ive heard, tumitino na sya ngayon, nagmamature na...
too bad..ganun lang kadali, nawala na sya. tapos ngayon nagpapaawa yung pulis. i say he should be locked in prison. ginawa nya yun, panagutan nya. and to think that he's a public official, lalo dapat double ang parusa. that's only fair right? he knows the laws. he knows better.
i saw my friend's morgue pics. its not something i enjoyed seeing. but that could never change the fact that it did happen, that he's already dead.
my condolences and prayers to his family, friends and especially his daughter and girlfriend.more for his daughter siguro. she never knew how fun his dad is. how he makes everyone crawl and cry of laughter at every inuman.
rest in peace, totoy bibbo.
& our love goes round and round;
2/14/2006 05:43:00 PM
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good things come to those who wait..
February 10, 2006
just when i thought id never get to have you, lo and behold, you came, with my favorite drink at tow.
thank you starbs,,you've never failed me.
and btw, i heart your new coffee to go containers. they're so hot.
i loved them so much i had to take a picture
twice
and Guatemala was just as wonderful as i remember it to be.
starbs, you're spoiling me too much..ikaw ren baka masanay ako..
& our love goes round and round;
2/10/2006 06:45:00 PM
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February 07, 2006
i want to kick my ass so hard..or maybe bury myself, that would be nice.
for the past few weeks, i have not been myself. im not really sure what triggered this, or when it all began. i just know that something is wrong.
what before would take me a few mins to do, now takes forever to finish. i cant think straight. i feel so dumb. its infuriating. at the end of each day, i ask myself, what have i done productive today? coz frankly i feel that i havent done a single thing right, or that i knew i could have done better, but i didnt. id always beat myself for these things, my ego is starting to go negative.
im not into impressing people, thats not me. i only try to impress myself. and quite frankly im not so happy about me now.
im so frustrated.
what could get me out of this!
and in the first place, WHat the hell is THIS and where did IT came from???
i dont think its PMS coz i just had my period a week or two ago.
i hate this.
and what's worse is that i know that whether im myself or not, it wont matter. im under constant evaluation by my new bosses and even my peers.( not that i have anything against that, that's part of every work, advertising or not. ) this is "feeling" cannot be accepted as a reason and i know that.
its just frustrating coz i know that if i do get a bad eval, its absofuckinlutely my fault, nobody else's. and yes i will take full responsibility. i cant blame this on my teddy bear or imaginary friend this time.
i just wish THIS would end...sooner rather than later.
i want me back!!! where are you?? yooohhoooo...
& our love goes round and round;
2/07/2006 05:19:00 PM
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age doesnt matter, maturity does.
February 01, 2006
its such a waste seeing and being around people who youd expect to at least show maturity, take age out of the equation, i dont care if she's ancient or not. coz frankly, not even my youngest sister would do what she did. it's such a waste of time.
here's a newsflash for you, you dont need to fabricate any conspiracy inside your shrinking head to justify what is happening. its really quite simple, you're no good. you've done zero to make anybody's work or life better. your all talk, thats the only thing you're good at. coz for a moment there i myself thought you might be good. but thats what you do, you sell..you sell yourself. but you never delivered.
ever.
you dont deserve the title, and after what you've done, i dont think you deserve much respect either.
My most true mind thus maketh mine eye untrue
& our love goes round and round;
2/01/2006 09:38:00 AM
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