February 02, 2004
kiss on the lips - you're sweet and simple but
quite daring. you move for the kill confidently
knowing the other person wants the same thing.


What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

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that'd be a nice way to start this..yeah yeah yeah...im in love! im mushy, im romantic, i blush alot, i smile alot..SO SUE ME! whew..been a while since i said something here..so let me start with him..who the heck is he? that guy i was talking about in my previous posts..the guy i liked more...and who lives some friggin miles away! a friend of mine told me that i just got another problem to bother myself with..here i go again, like i was never hurt before..like i dont know how hard it was to make a long distance relationship work. HELL! i know! but i dont care! love should be hard, 1 inch or 1mile apart.. its up to the both of you to make it work right? well, i got the support of the rest of my friends..i could make this work..yeah! i think i could pull this off..one more time! i should! hey! i love this guy..ive been waiting for like about 3 years man! he's so shy...too shy i think (yep..that's how the shy guy tag was born..mye knows that) but hell..last january 28..i was..shocked? i dont even know how to describe how i felt..i swear! i think i even told him "r u ok? r u on drugs?" or something like that..coz really..who would've thought that after the longest time..as in loooooongest time! he'd actually take that risk..and confessed...he was actually a bit aggrassive..well..yeah..not just a bit..but hell..it was A.O.K.! at least we're both happy now..i cant do all the talking...im the girl..and i think he wisen up a bit and realized that. but i swear! it was so unexpected..we were talking about what the hell i was doing that time, then suddenly there he goes! nuff about that..the important thing here is...IM HAPPY! As in really REALLY happy!

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aint it frustrating..when you make this stupid poem..you dont come to class the next day coz u thought they'd be discussing it then, at least you saved yourself from embarassment by not being there when your poem is read..then the next class, you came and found out they did nothing when you were not there and all of a sudden the prof had that urge to read your poem out loud?? and the thing is..he not just reading..he's critizising it..its part of the job description and you know it! and you suddenly feel like evaporating right then and there! f*cking CREWRIT! as if it wasn't humiliating enough..he once again read our revisions..good thing mine was read almost at the last few mins so most of the people were eager to go..meaning they have something else to think about rather than listen to my stupid poem about a pear..hahahahaha! am i doomed to talk about pear the whole term?? NOOOOOO!!! I actually like writing stuff..but damn...not this way..

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im having a prob here...kat's bday is coming up..the thing is..know the "other guy"..i told him to come..coz at that time..i really wanted him to..now..i'd rather be with my boyfriend..who fucking wouldnt? so i asked my bf and he said..he might..the thing is..i think that the "other guy" really wanted to come..and i think he's expecting that im still single..why? coz i havent told him! hey! what should i do..just text him.."i got a bf na" out of the blue? i mean i know im a bitch..but..still..i liked this guy (note its in past tense..although i like him still now..its more of friend like than like like,,hehe!)and he knows that..disgusting as it may sound..we're like MU (i really ditest this term..i dont know if anyone ever uses this anymore..but heck..cant think of any other word appropriate for what we are..hehe) so..i dont have the guts to just tell him..hey, i love someone else now..i dont need you here..shoo! im not that bad..and its not all true..i want to be his friend..i mean..he's a good friend...showbiz as it may sound to all those who've seen us together last 4th of january..but anyway..really..he's a nice guy..sweet..but that's just about it..i love my bf now..really..dont go raising your eyebrows and tell me if im for real now..IAM FOR REAL! I LOVE HIM!! hehehehe! suddenly, having a bf seems hard..i got about 4 guys hanging..hehehe! they kept texting and calling..me? NR!...is it my fault? im trying to be monogamous here people..dont make it any more harder! how can i tell them..in the nicest way..to stop bothering me...hehehehehe! am i gonna be soooo bad if i told them frankly that i have a bf now..i scared i might get a so what? reply, you know..defense mechanism..since they didnt ask and everything..yeah maybe i deserve some of the side comments id get..but is it my fault that i want to be happy..as in really happy?? finally, i get to be with someone i really like..not someone who just happens to make me laugh now..then id leave later...this is for real...i hope..hehehe! nah! i really think it is..wish me luck...

random dashboard

so you wont have a hard time buying gifts for me this christmas, here's my long list: (i know, ang aga)

1. Macbook
2. DSLR Camera
3. Diving Equip (in this order: mask, snorkel, fins, wetsuit, regulator, BCD, tank)
4. Dive trip (tubataha or kota k or apo reef or palau...keri na hehe)
5. Shopping spree at Ross/Home depot/Target
6. shoes, any kind with heels not higher than 2" (im 7 1/2)
7. my first ever havaianas (brazzziiiilllll)
8. a beanbag or a cool comfy chair
9. flat screen TV, hehe.
10. a year supply of booze (if beer, RH lang pls)
11. Art materials (any medium, from crayons and coloring books to canvass and acrylics)
12. Drumset or Kahon. (wlang pilosopo)
13. Oven. i want to bake.
14. punching bag and gloves
15. a leather basketball.


Of course, Money is always the best. that way you know i will get what i really want.

And look at it this way, if you give me any of my top 5, i can consider that as an early bday gift as well. hehe :)

Pa-Fedex nalang ah, PM me for my address hehehehe! thanks dear santa clauses!

behind the wheel

still the same ciara, just with more work and longer messier hair. ah and yes, a certified diver now, not that i have the time and money to dive anyway. maybe by november/december/january soon.

traffic jam

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on reverse

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GPS system

this is my way to stalk all you readers. mwahahahahahahaha! coolness!

credits

1 & 2